Serious Catching Up To Do

What did you say? I haven't posted any pictures since September???? OH MY! 

Well, let me see what I can do about that. Here's October in a nutshell!

October 2011 was: soccer, a visit from my parents - which happened to be my mom's first visit as a HEALTHY HEALED woman, a trip to Haiti in which WE PASSED COURT, packing for our move, school projects and field trips, birthday parties galore (mostly Libby's sweet Chinese friends), Harvest festivals, and Halloween. It was a significant month and here I am simplifying it with a paragraph and few pictures. God moved mountains and blessed us greatly in October 2011. Here come the pictures!

 

sweet Sunny girl!

The day we passed court!!!!!! October 20, 2011

November coming soon:)

YES! Progress feels SO GOOD!

Today we discovered our adoption papers moved out of the Foreign Affairs office and into Archives. This is fabulous news. Archives takes 1-2 weeks. Then we go straight to MOI (Ministry of Interior). I've seen families get out of MOI in as little as 2 weeks, others as long as 8-12 weeks (or longer, but I'm not going there). MOI gives Immigration permission to print Sunny's passport. Not sure how long printing of passport takes. Then all our papers go to Embassy and we'll wait for approval from Embassy. This could take 5-8 weeks. Then comes the blessed Visa Appointment and Sunny comes home. So - you see, we are getting close. How close is hard to say, but its closer today than it was yesterday and I. Am. Excited!

Celebrated the good news with a family trip to Orange Leaf and then God decided to celebrate and created snow this evening (it was 60 degrees this AM, go figure!).

AND our updated home study arrived reflecting our change of address so I get to mail that off tomorrow.

AND I figured out our fingerprints do not expire in May/June like I once thought. Billy's are good until August and mine until October. So maybe, just maybe I will never have to do fingerprints again!

REJOICING!
C

Gotta Believe

I realized today I have so much catching up to do on this blog. We've moved 2 times in the last 2.5 months - once to Amarillo, into a rent house and now into our new home. And somehow I've managed 7 weeks of homeschool, starting a new adoption lifegroup, making it through colds, a 12 hour trip for a final event and more. Its been BUSY!

And I will catch up - pictures and all! But not tonight. Tonight I just want to touch on a couple of things:

1. Our God heals! My sister found out through an ultrasound that her baby had a growth that indicating possible major defects. Today, her follow-up ultrasound showed that the growth is resolving! She is still waiting on blood work to rule out Turner's syndrome, but so far the baby is growing perfectly!!! So relieved for her!

2. Our adoption process is HARD! And I have just GOTTA BELIEVE that: 1. God is being a Father to the fatherless. 2. God WILL redeem the time once she is home. If I don't believe that, I'm a mess. I don't have a choice, I've gotta believe it. Lord, help me with my unbelief.

New possible timeframe for Sunny's homecoming: May - August:::::::::::(

Updates and Pictures to come....
Blessings,
Cindy

If Faith Can Move a Mountain...

When my alarm beeped at 6AM I was in a deep sleep having a brief, but glorious dream. I had to lay there for a moment and consider the dream that gave me such joy and peace.

In the first short scene, I was outside. Someone was playing golf in the background (random, I know) and all the sudden I knew I was supposed to get on my knees on that sidewalk and pray - no matter what anyone thought. As I prayed I remember feeling every anxiety leave. I felt full of faith and had no fear and I knew I had God's attention. I don't remember what I was praying about. It was just the sense that I wanted to pray in this way all the time because it was so satisfying. 

In the next scene I was in a car with some people in Alaska looking at a snow covered mountain. All the sudden I watched an entire side of the mountain fall away into an avalanche. Then, BEEP BEEP BEEP... I was awake. Right away, my thought was - God's getting ready to move our mountain and bring Sunny home and all the rest of the waiting HCRM children will follow like an avalanche! All the barriers are about to crumble.

I quickly brushed my teeth so I could sit with the Lord for a while and sip my coffee. In my devotional for today the title was "Asking God" from the book "A Year With God" edited by Richard Foster and Julia L. Roller. I excitedly read today's word. (Bold print and underlining - my personal additions....)

Luke 18: 1-8a

"Then Jesus told them a parable about their need to pray always and not to lose heart. He said, "In a certain city there was a judge who neither feared God nor had respect for people. In that city there was a widow who kept coming to him and saying, 'Grant me justice against my opponent..' For a while he refused; but later he said to himself, 'Though I have no fear of God and no respect for anyone, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will grant her justice, so that she may not wear me out by continually coming.'" And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God grant justice to his chosen ones who cry to him day and night? Will he delay long in helping them? I tell you, he will quickly grant justice to them."

If you followed our adoption of Gracie you may remember that the week we received her referral was the same week we finally sold our home that had been on the market for a year. Also that week Billy signed a contract with a record label. It was as if everything that had been held back was released at one time.

Well here we are in a new city, Billy has been given a new (and awesome) opportunity for his songwriting and to teach other songwriters! And today it has been confirmed that our house in San Antonio is under contract and certainly set to close on March 9! So....though several steps still must take place to bring Sunny home, I believe with all my heart that we are close. I can still recall that feeling from my dream of complete faith, no fear and absolute certainty that God is listening and about to answer my prayers - so I am praying for justice today as I have day and night for 2 years, but this time I believe the mountain is really moving. As Christy Nockel's song "Waiting Here For You" says...."If faith can move a mountain, let the mountain move! I'm waiting here for You, with my hands lifted high in praise. And its You, we adore, singing Hallelujah!"

Find Me...A Morning Prayer

Find me in the quiet place and talk to me
Tell me great and mighty things, your mysteries
Show me more of who you are
Restorer of the broken heart
Give to me your joy 'til I am glowing

Find me in the quiet place and sing to me
Set upon my heart and lips your praises free
Like a father to his child
Sing your mercies, tender, mild
Give to me your peace that's ever-lasting

Find me in the quiet place and move in me
Lift my head, make me stand to walk with Thee
Be my light and show the way
Do not let me waste this day
Give to me the chance to bring you glory

Poetic Present Songs (c) 2012

Confessions of a Waiting Mom

Before my list begins let me say,  this is a vulnerable, honest list in hopes that healing fully comes in saying it "out loud". I don't walk around all day feeling every one of these things at one time...but they are all ever present in my flesh. And I pray that others walking through long adoptions will be encouraged when they realize they are not alone in these faults. But that God is working in each of us to complete the good work he has begun...a plan that started while we were yet sinners. He is good. I am not. But he's making something out of me and he will do the same for our Sunny too.


Confessions of a Waiting Mom...

#1: On days when I have many things to get done and two beautiful children at my heels, I often vanish into the imagination of what the day will be like when I realize I can take Sunny home. "Imagination" isn't exactly the right word. I almost go to another place, transcend into another world and fully feel the overwhelming joy and relief that day will bring. I cry like it's really happening right at that moment. A well-written play to be acted out in my mind regularly (drama-queen, I know). This morning I entered that place thinking of the moment Sunny and I step out of pastor's car at the airport realizing I will miss his dear, deep eyes and pleasant smile but relishing that I don't have to leave Sunny ever again. Tears well up at the thought, as the scene plays out in my mind....
And then I snap back to reality...another reason to cry. The time has not yet come.
I don't walk around crying all day, just in case you were starting to feel concerned for me. But I do have those  moments when I imagine Sunny is home and hope has been realized rather than deferred.


Jesus protect my heart from the sickness that comes when hope is pushed back and fill me with joy in the honor I have been given to wait on you. Help me live in the present fully; enjoying the children you have given me as I wait for Sunny to join us. Help me tear down imaginations that can lead to false expectations so I can live in the authentic reality of this journey, worshipping you in this present waiting.



#2: Watching other adoptions move beautifully through to completion for other friends is so beautiful.... But it also stings. I'm jealous they get to move on and enjoy life with their new child while Sunny still has to wait. At the same time, I have a number of friends even further behind in their adoptions....who will wait even longer than we have for Sunny. Perspective is a must-have that is not easily grasped. 


Jesus, give me a heart for every orphan, like your heart. Let me fully rejoice for each one's homecoming. Let me fully devote to pray for those who must wait longer. And help me wait better....selflessly.



#3: I have faith God hears me and sees Sunny and that he will bring her home eventually. But I often doubt he'll really move mountains for us. Sure, I have moments of great, doubtless faith... But after two years of waiting - those two years including watching her face grow and change, it's hard to really believe this is the moment when everything will change and He will make it happen. 


Jesus, increase my faith.



#4: There is a beautiful, godly older orphan who has taken Sunny in at HCRM...she's like Sunny's mom. While I find this good and important and reassuring that she is being watched and cared for, I am also jealous that she gets to be Sunny's mom-figure right now and I grieve when I think of how much Sunny will miss her once home. How can I have so many mixed emotions about this simple act of love? God has provided for Sunny an important, emotional attachment and yet I am wanting that all for myself. The ache is so big. 


Jesus, teach me to trust in your plan even when it hurts. Help me to see that you are loving Sunny well in giving her this precious mother-figure. 



#5. I cannot think of even one reason that would make delaying Sunny's homecoming worthwhile, but God has not brought her home and I must continue to trust the potter with Sunny - his living, breathing, growing, needy clay. 


Jesus, help me not to doubt your goodness. Remind me your ways are higher than mine and that my ache for her is a small portion of YOUR ache for her. Amen.


So, what's your "waiting-mom confession"? Let's bring all our doubts and fears into the light together so they can be conquered and our waiting be made fruitful in every way!


Blessings friends,
Cindy

Sad, Sweet and Healthy

This morning I overheard this:
Libby to Gracie: Do you miss your Ethiopian mom and dad? 
Gracie: yeah.
Recognizing this was most likely something that Libby was struggling with but had diverted to Gracie I asked Libby: "Do you miss your Chinese mom and dad?"
Libby in her little-girl-scared-to-tell-the-truth-voice: No! I love you, mommy.
To which I replied, "Well, I know that, but it's ok if you wonder about your Chinese mom and dad. That is very normal. Do you miss them?"
Libby, still afraid to reveal her deepest thoughts replied: "sort of."

Such are the conversations in an adoptive family. Sad, but sweet. And most importantly, healthy. When I shared this with Billy he asked how a 5 year old could be aware of that kind of thing. Its because we talk about her story and we pray for her biological family so she has words for it. Little ones are more aware of their emotions than we think. If we give them words for it, there is healing. Now she knows I'm not scared or threatened by talking about her feelings for her biological family. And one day, she'll open up completely. For today, this is enough. Makes me cry. Makes my heart ache for her, for the unknown biological family. But it also makes me happy that we were given a glimpse into Libby's heart/world. Trust, light, love.....so good.